Wednesday, August 5, 2020


This summer has been filled with a lot of things; in July my grandma crossed over after having been diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer back in May. I am grateful she didn't have a long, lingering sickness. She was able to be medicated for her pain and the last time I talked with her (via video chat due to Covid-19) she was at my aunts beautiful, rural home in central Illinois. She took her phone around to show me the horses in the pasture and the wide open sky, dotted with fluffy clouds, and her sweet cat, and pictures of loved ones on the walls. My aunt had her surrounded by beauty and by memories of happy times. Later, when she had to go to the hospice center, my dad would sit by her side and sing songs to her. She was a strong, beautiful lady and she slipped away on July 7th. 

As all things cycle and seasons gently rise and fall in the continuing breath of life, my sister married her love a few short weeks later and I was filled with deep gladness to be able to be there for her and with her as she pledged her love to her new husband. The day before she married, my mother gave me a ring that my grandma had worn when she went into hospice. I wore it for the wedding and it felt, truly, like my grandmas sweet spirit was among us. 

I will have a post of the girls flower girl dresses and some photos of the wedding and the yellow dress I made to wear there but today it felt more right to just post about the quiet daily life I am so grateful for. While it was so good to see my parents for a brief time and to gain a wonderful new brother (and two darling nephews!) I was so happy to come back home and to rest in the gentle arms of these hills. I drove out yesterday to pick up my son from his friends house and the ache of grateful joy was almost unbearable. I love this place; I love this land, and I will be content and happy to stay here for the rest of my time on this earth. 

I love this little town, though I would jump at the chance to eventually move back out into the country. I love the familiar faces of my neighbors and the small talk and town gossip and news. I was ridiculously excited when our new pharmacy opened yesterday. I love all the school issues and sports and making cookies and masks for all my boys, whether biological or heart adopted. I love the rain and the sun and the moods that fall and rise over the fields and hills and the wind that rustles through the trees. I don't deserve this happiness but I am so grateful for it. I love my home here. 

One of David's latest paintings!

After the wedding I brought my girls home from their summer visit with grandma and grandpa and the boys stayed behind (except for Judah, who decided he wanted to stay home this year). We went out to check on the berries and found that there is a whole lot of them and more that will ripen over the next week or so. The girls picked all they could fit into their tied up bandannas and plan to go back with their plastic beach buckets to get more. I'll be happy if we can get enough for some jam and maybe a pie or two. But, I am very wary of the copious poison ivy entwined around the berry bushes - I'm recovering from a second poison ivy episode and I don't want to deal with another! 😂

I was able to bring my great-great grandmas sewing machine home from my parents. They have been keeping it for me for a year or so. I spent an afternoon rearranging my sewing space and fitting the cabinet in. Above it I hung the picture my parents gave me that came from my grandpas bedroom. On the back a note reveals that it was given to my grandpa at the time of his mothers funeral, in 1999. It seemed only fitting to keep both picture and sewing machine together. I am so lucky to have these things to remind me of my family that has gone on. 

And yes, I definitely plan to use this awesome treadle machine as soon as I get it running! I think all it needs is a long belt but I will have it looked over and cleaned by my service guy to make sure it has all the right parts. 

It's been a very emotionally intense summer and I am liking this calm, cool August so far. After weeks of humidity and near 100-degree days it's been breezy and cool this one so far. I smell autumn in the air and a spicy, intoxicating scent from woods as the earth prepares for the cold months ahead. It makes me feel so alive and filled with wild energy and joy. In three weeks the kids return to school so I will be making a variety of mask styles for them and have some plastic face shields as well. It will be a bit of an adjustment as they transition back into a different kind of school year but I am hopeful they will do ok and the teachers and staff will not have a terribly difficult time (although I know they are working so hard as they deal with all this new stuff). 

I made these last night from our own green tomatoes!

I will close for now. I love you. You are important to me. You are my family. Be well, be safe, know you are loved. 



1 comment:

  1. Glad you could have family around you. You look pretty busy and the berries sound great (not the poison ivy).


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